So WHY on earth would I WANT to do something like this? It's the fact that I have new goals for myself. I have grown bored with 5ks, 10ks and obstacle course races. I really want to tap into an area of my mind I haven't explored yet. I want to see what I am capable of. Ultimately, I want to experience optimal health and physique. Similarly, I want to experience a new place in my relationship with Jesus. Going to God in prayer and allowing Him to draw attention to things in my character or behavior that are not like Him, is uncomfortable. But I desire to be MORE LIKE HIM and going to the only One with the right to Judge those areas of my life, is the only way to do it. Having this blog, posting videos that seem like nonsensical rambling, posting photos of myself and sharing it publicly assists me in becoming comfortable with having others critique me. I may never hear or read a word about anything I post. But I know people are viewing and drawing their own conclusions, developing their own opinions and passing their own judgment. I'm ok with that - or more ok with it ;) Over the past couple of years I have read so many comments, both good and bad, from people who felt the need to express their thoughts around another person's personal journey to health and total wellness, as well as around an individual's position as a Christian and their faith. I cringed when people were negative and felt relief when people were positive and encouraging. I realize there will always be both, and all that really matters is the individual's ability to glean the most helpful and encouraging, from both the good and bad, and continue to move forward. I am ok with knowing I may experience the same, because emotionally, I am experiencing it as though I AM already hearing and reading every word, and it is causing me to become emotionally stronger, for when I do (if I decide to) step on the competitive stage. And of course, it compels me to step into God's spotlight and see if what is being said aligns with what HE SAYS ABOUT ME - because ultimately, that is all that matters when it comes to my spiritual life.
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I love this - that you're thinking about this aspect of competing. Many competitors are blindsided when they, after getting less than favorable placing, feel they are not "good enough". Or, even worse sometimes, place really well and equate that with being "good enough".
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Thank you for posting Michelle. As always, you offer a unique way to view the situation and challenge my thoughts in the meantime. By the way, I knew you would pick up on the "cringe" comment, and I have already been thinking about why it is the case ;) Thanks again!!
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